Overcommitting is one of the quickest way to overwhelm.
When you say “yes” to too many things you lose your precious time to take care of things in your life that you need too. Saying “yes” to everyone else often means saying “no” to what really matters to you.
This can cause resentment, not only to the person you said “yes” to, but to yourself as well. This is not fair to you or to them.
Saying “no” is about setting boundaries and being respectful to yourself.
Marie Forleo calling it “Hopping on the no train”.
Saying “no” doesn’t have to be difficult and you should not feel bad about it.
If you are struggling with getting aboard the “no” train here are some tips that you can put to use.
1. Explain your other commitments.
Everyone gets busy at times; people will understand that you have other commitments.
It is okay to be honest and let people know you can’t take on any other commitments right now, that your plate is full right now. They will not only understand, but will appreciate your honesty.
2. Say that you can’t commit right now.
It’s not uncommon to get hit with requests for immediate help. You can let them know that you can’t help right now but that you might be able to help soon. If it really is urgent, they’ll find someone else and shouldn’t feel resentful towards you.
3. Tell them that you need time to think about it.
Do not use this option if you really do want to just say “no.” Take the time you need to consider their request and don’t forget to get back to them.
4. If someone is trying to sell something to you, tell them you do not have a need for it right now, but if your needs change you can get back to them.
This puts an end to the request quickly without the other person feeling insulted. After all, you’re rejecting their product or service; you’re not rejecting them personally.
5. Refer them to someone else to get the job done.
Passing the request on to someone else, especially if they could do a better job, or if they have more time, is a great way to say “no”. This option works well in many cases like when you are actually too busy or you would rather not work with the person. It keeps everything respectful and they leave feeling that you have helped them.
You life will run smoother if you start to say “no” to things you do not want to do or do not have time to do. Setting these boundaries will help you lead a richer life.
Saying “no” may seem difficult at first, but after the first few times it will get easier. You will be surprised that most people are much more understanding and responsive than you first thought. Most of the fear you have to saying “no” to others is not real.
Remember that there is no reason to lie when you say “no” to anyone. Be honest and confident when responding to requests, don’t beat around the bush or try to come up with the best reason to say “no”. This is one of those times you need to say “no” and let it be. Don’t make a big deal about it, it is what it is.
The Epidemic of People Pleasing
Now go give it a try and see how you feel.
Here’s to setting boundaries and saying “no”!